I Can. We Can.  

The Beginning: My First Steps on Embracing Self-Care


            I am fat.  I can say that I have either been fat or perceived myself as fat for at least 50 years.  For the last 25 years, I have not been able to get my 5’1” body below 200 pounds. 

            Remarkably, I have been blessed with pretty good health – until recently.  Now the burden of weight and general lack of self-care are having consequences – physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

            Last year I served as Carolyn’s writing coach and editor on her new book, Transforming Your Life through Self-Care: A Guide to Tapping into Your Deep Beauty and Inner Worth.  The irony was that as I was helping Carolyn write about self-care, my weight hit 250 pounds and I broke my shoulder, an injury I am still slowly recovering from. 

            For the first time in my life, I was brought to my knees (not literally because I don’t think I can get there) by my weight. Carolyn, who by now had become a soul sister and friend, offered to coach me.  Wouldn’t you think I would jump at the chance to work with a world-recognized wellness expert and bodybuilder?

            Not me. Why?  I think it boiled down to three reasons:

  1. I am a pretty stubborn person who does not like to ask for help.
  2. Clean eating and exercise are not things I have practiced too often in my life. I would say that they are actually things I don’t like, and I don’t like to do things I don’t like.
  3. I feel like a failure.While I am a successful person in almost all areas of my life, I have always felt like a failure when it comes to losing and keeping off weight.

           Carolyn never pushed me to accept her generous offer.  Smart lady.  I don’t do well when someone pushes me.  I get very rebellious. But I knew what she was waiting for because it is all in her book. 

           She was waiting for me to have an “aha” moment.

           So three months after her initial offer, I woke up one morning and changed the language I was using about myself – another strategy she recommends in the book. Now my language became:

  1. I am a persistent and determined person who loves knowledge.
  2. I am an experimenter who does not need to live in past experiences with diets and exercise.
  3. I am not a failure.I am a person whom picks herself up and keeps trying.  I do not give up.

           Ah, the power of language.

           Carolyn was thrilled, and she is now my coach.  She asked that her book become my bible to self-care and that we work through it together. We are talking at least two to three times a week, as I become the authority of my life. I have already started changing my diet and starting to exercise.  I will tell you more about that later.

           Being a writer, I suggested that as I go on this journey, I share my thoughts with others in a blog. Then we came up with idea that I – the student — would share my thoughts, and she – the coach — would respond.

           A match made in heaven, we hope. 

           So here’s what is going to happen. By the time you can borrow (library) a copy of her book next summer, I will have been on this journey for almost a year. My goal is make a major change not only in my body, but also in my attitude.  A life-long, life-changing transformation.

           And the first step is putting my trust in Carolyn.


            I am still jumping over the moon with the news of your “aha” moment. That thought-provoking moment that suddenly gives a clear vision and specific understanding. It changes everything in an instant.

         What a blessing! Together we have accomplished significant ACTIONS already about your diet, exercise, and attitude.   Let me take a second to review the three essential steps that must take place before anyone can honestly move forward with healthy lifestyle changes:

  1. Knowledge: We have all heard the powerful words of  “When you know better, you do better.”   And the way to do it is to empower learning with educational content so we discover new insights and skills.
  2. Inspiration: That’s when the “aha” moment takes place—which tells you the “why.” When you recognize these mind-blowing flashes of clarity, suddenly things in your life will start making better sense and provide you with the power to shift your thinking to greater possibilities.
  3. Action: Knowledge + Inspiration + Action = Massive Transformation. Take the knowledge and combine it with inspiration, which will ignite into the act of doing. That is when massive transformation starts to take place.

           As a team, you, and I are working towards healthy lifestyle goals. We did it with the creation of the book. Now we are taking the same action with as you use the book as your roadmap to transforming your life.  And let me also remind you that we are going to make this journey fun– every step of the way.

           So dear readers, be sure to join us on this journey in our weekly blogs.

Summer 2019, you can borrow a copy of Transforming Your Life through Self-Care: A Guide to Tapping into Your Deep Beauty and Inner Worth at a library near you. Worldwide | Rowman & Littlefield Publishing Group 

Learn more about Carolyn’s other work. Visit: Catalog

Empower Learning with Educational-Focused Content 🌎 Carolyn A. Brent is an award-winning and bestselling American author, bodybuilder and eldercare legislation advocate. Designated as an Editor’s Choice, she was reviewed by the Library Journal as well. Verdict: excellent! Her work grace the bookshelves both national and international libraries such as The Library of Congress, Harvard University, Johns Hopkins Medical Research Library, Stanford University and more. Harlequin | Thorndike Press —Gale, A Cengage Company, has made it available in LARGE print and hardcover to colleges, universities, and libraries nationwide.

Brent is also known as a National Physique Committee (NPC) Masters Women’s Figure Champion—1st Place Winner Age 60 category; and Health & Wellness Guru. She is the founder of Across All Ages and two nonprofit organizations, CareGiverStory Inc., and Grandpa’s Dream.



About Carolyn Brent

Dr. Carolyn A. Brent, is an award-winning bestselling author and a National Physique Committee (NPC) Masters Women's Figure Champion at age 60. She is an expert on both self-care and caregiving; she is the founder of Across All Ages and two nonprofit organizations, CareGiverStory Inc. and Grandpa's Dream. Carolyn's research and extensive collection of published works have made her a notable figure in her field. For seventeen years, she worked for some of the world's leading pharmaceutical companies and has worked as a volunteer at various assisted-living facilities. Her award-winning books include The Caregiver's Companion: Caring for Your Loved One Medically, Financially and Emotionally While Caring for Yourself and The Caregiver's Legal Survival Guide: Navigating through the Legal System.

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